do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
