I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize
