Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
