i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
