I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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