I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
