I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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