How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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