hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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