I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I could fuck to npr.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
