dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Randomize
