i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
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