those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize
