I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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