oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
