Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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