My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
