I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Sorry my hands just texted you
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
