Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
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I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
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I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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