Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
You may now shotgun with the bride
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Randomize
