Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Acid is not a monday night drug
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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