Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there