so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize