I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
