walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
The adults are the big ones right?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize