i would punch a child for taco bell
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Randomize
