and i looked up. we had an audience...
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
