brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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