I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
