why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Randomize
