i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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