I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Randomize
