Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
