Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
