I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
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