I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
