Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
