Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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