Swine flu. Run for my life!
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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