return my video game
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize