i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
