it was like his penis was on wheels.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
