Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
You're like the curious george of whores
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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