I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
