I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
jump out the window naked night went bad
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