his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
