real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
