I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
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