So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I'm sobbing to NWA
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
