I can tuck mytits in my pants
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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